My Bears lost the Superbowl last night. I'm so depressed. I can't even say that Indy won it, because the Bears had a lot of great chances they didn't capitalize on and they made several stupid mistakes. They definitely LOST the game. The fist visit to the Superbowl in twenty-one years and they LOST it! I slept in my Urlacher jersey last night... you know how when you break up with a guy so you wear his clothes because it makes you feel both better and worse? That's what it was like. *sigh* Now there's no more football until September...
Below I am posting part two of my essay. The responses to the first part were favorable (thanks Sue and Shari), so I'm going to continue with it. I think the Disney metaphor gets a bit stretched here, but see what you think. It's just a draft, remember!
Also, if you get a chance, check out postsecret this week. There is a postcard about a wedding that sounds just like something my ex-best friend would have written. Can you guess which one it is?
I was soon to learn that his looks were the only charming part about him. He was a master of the verbal put down, of condescension and derision. Truly, he was Gaston, Druesella, Anastasia and Millificent put together. Cocky and arrogant but also convinced of how wonderful he was. He convinced me after a while that I was lucky to have him, being the dowdy girl I was. It was four years before I came to the conclusion that while I didn’t have to have the love a Disney Princess was entitled to, I was in fact entitled to more than I was getting from
Free for the first time as an adult, I told myself that I must be thankful for what lessons I had learned – the most important one being that there is no such thing as a one true love.
At the start of my second year of college, I met Dan. I was very careful never to promise him forever or to say that he was “the One.” I know he was offended by that, but I knew better; I couldn’t just say words that weren’t true. Dan helped me realize what a bum deal Cinderella and Snow White got. Dan worked for the first fourteen months we were together. After that he developed a chronic medical condition that kept him from working. He couldn’t stand or sit very long comfortably, so he took a lot of pain killers and played video games for the next four years. As a senior in college, I was student teaching and working two jobs to pay the bills and keep him supplied in video games. I cooked, cleaned, washed his clothes and stayed out of his way when he was “having a bad day.” It never occurred to me to object, because how can you argue with someone who’s sick? I tried not to resent him for getting all of the meds and toys that he wanted while I was still wearing clothes from high school because I couldn’t afford anything new. Dan could be sweet, but he could also have black moods that would cast a pall over everything around. When Dan was upset, the whole sky seemed darker, and even the walls seemed to be holding their breaths, waiting for the inevitable explosion to come. I never asked to go to the ball, I wouldn’t dream of sticking up for myself like Cinderella did. I kept the house as clean as I could on eighty hour weeks, doing laundry and dishes whenever I had a spare moment, usually with a textbook or lesson plan in my hands. I definitely did not whistle while I worked like Snow White did. I swear all seven of the dwarves couldn’t have been more difficult than one Dan.
After five years of being the poor, underappreciated, misunderstood heroine I left Dan. I knew no one was going to rescue me, that I’d stay the maid/depressed maiden forever if I didn’t leave.After two failed relationships, I returned to the stories of my childhood searching for answers. Where did I go wrong?