Welcome Back

About three years ago, I decided I needed to lose some weight. I'd been married a few months and when I looked at the wedding pictures, I realized that I was much rounder than I liked. I joined a calorie counting web site, hopped on my Sinister Stationary Bike of Doom, and lost almost 40 pounds. I looked good, I felt great, and thought that the hard work was worth it - despite it turning me into a calorie counting nightmare to be around. I can remember nights where it'd be 8pm and I'd be starving, but I couldn't eat anything because I only had 25 calories left to eat that day, and even a banana had 90. I cried a lot those 5 or so months. I rode that SSBOD every single day for four and a half months, at least three of those months for sessions that burned 500 calories each. I avoided chocolate, pepsi, and sugar - my three favorite foods in the world.

But I looked good. Real good.

The last three years I've been giving myself a lot of leeway to eat/do what I liked, since I'd worked so hard to lose all that weight - all the while ignoring that the scale had started to creep back up. Yesterday I couldn't ignore it any more - I weigh again what I did on my wedding day.

Fuck.

So as of yesterday I'm back on the calorie counting website, and I'm back on the SSBOD. I'm going to try to be more realistic about it this time so I don't burn out so quickly. I'm hoping this spring brings us a treadmill so I can run again (running on the road is super tough with my knee issues now). I'd like to make sure I stretch every day, since it makes such a difference in my pain levels when I work out. I'd also like to take the dog for more walks, since Jax keeps me walking at a pretty fast pace. I hope you'll be patient with me as I begin this journey *again*, because I know I'll lose patience with myself.